permission to put the cup down…

Dearest friend,

Today’s conversation is called Permission to Stop Pouring Yourself Out. Permission to stop pouring yourself out for everyone around you. And you may be thinking, ummmm, yeah right. That’s not the way it works. We don’t even have a second to breathe sometimes because of the demands of our lives. It’s our job to take care of everyone around us! It’s exhausting!

It’s my job to take care of everyone around me – they NEED ME! Their happiness is on me. Have you ever thought that?! I have, and not only did I think that, I absolutely used to believe that was true, and so I made it my mission to warn women about the dangers of not making time for self-care, because if everyone needs us, we need to have something to give. You can’t pour from an empty cup. That’s what I would say.

And you’d come to me and tell me how exhausted you were because you, somehow without knowing it, turned your life motto into BE EVERYTHING TO EVERYONE, and you’re unsure of how you’re actually going to be able to get up tomorrow and do the same things and be everything to everyone all over again.

And I would’ve said to you – you can’t pour from an empty cup. What have you done to fill your cup lately? Girl, you need to take yourself a bubble bath.

(This is not helpful advice, and I am just so sorry if I ever said that to you.)

But at one of my most recent speaking engagements, a sweet woman came up to me and we were chatting and she was encouraging me that I needed to continue to spend time with God, because my needs are important too. And I said, that’s right, you’re right. You can’t pour from an empty cup. And she said something that absolutely completely changed my life forever, and it’s about to change yours too. How’s that for a lead-in?! She said, oh no no no no no, not pour! You can’t pour!

She said, what happens when you pour water out from a cup?

“It’s empty.” I told her.

That’s right. It’s empty, and you’re the one doing the pouring. We don’t pour, we don’t pour – we overflow. And then God gets to do the work.

And I about dropped dead right there. 

We not supposed to be pouring. Time and time and time again, God calls us to something so much better than that!

And the more curious I got about this, the more I just had to see where I had gone wrong and how to start getting this right.

Here’s what I know. We all want these glorious, beautiful lives. Rich, full, joyful lives. With branches that provide shade for our families and friends and communities. Beautiful flowers that bloom. And the fruit the follows. And in the end, the trees of our lives would stand tall and glorious. That’s what we want.

BUT.

What happens when you pour out from your cup? It’s empty!

You’ve just spent who knows how long filling your cup and it took about .2 seconds for it to be empty again. And then, if you’re like me, you don’t mean to but you tend to keep score, so you head back to all the people you helped or poured out for and asked them for a little splash of water in return, right?! And maybe they do give us a little, but we turn right around and try to solve all the world’s problems, and out it goes.

If what we really want is a life full of love – to be this beautiful tree, right, we are working against it every time we pick up our cup and pour out for someone else. Every time our tree gets water, we scoop it out and give it to someone else? That doesn’t make any sense. We’re taking life away from the very place that our tree needs it most – which are the roots!

This is a problem.

So the first thing we need to do is put the cup down.

And then we’ll get into the Bible to get to work on some roots, so we can start all that overflowing. I can’t wait to show you guys what I found. It’s so good.

So good, in fact, that Jen and I are dedicating 13 weeks, YES you read that correctly. 13 weeks to dig (see what I did there?!) into what it looks like to be intentional root-growers. Taking the Word of God, practically applying it to our lives, and watching Him overflow through us in ways we could never ask or imagine.

In this week’s episode, we shared some woes about how hard it is, sometimes, to get rooted, to stay connected to the Source, and to show up in the world that way. And then we shared hope. So check out this week’s podcast episode!

AND AND! You can purchase your very own digital or hard copy of the Deeply-Rooted Devotional that we’re basing this series off of. Get it while it’s hot! (Literally, is it hot where you are?! It’s 81 and humid at the very date and time I’m writing this.)

Alright, girl. Get it.

xoxo,

Lisa

P.S. Also, I PREACHED on this very topic, and I’d love for you to check it out!

P.P.S. I feel very LOOK HERE! DO THIS! CHECK THIS OUT! today, but…if you haven’t registered for Fight Club Summer Session yet, you’re missing out. JOIN THIS MOVEMENT. Click on the image below for all the details.